Pamala Vincent @ Wisdom Pills – What Matters Most In Education: Human Relationships – 11-7-15

what-matters-most-in-education

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Pamala Vincent @ Wisdom Pills   –   What Matters Most In Education: Human Relationships  –   11-7-15

By Pamala Vincent, Wisdom Pills, November 6, 2015

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When I began teaching in the 70’s, things were a lot different. Reading, writing and arithmetic used to be the name of the game.

Students showed up to school prepared to learn. They came from intact families (divorced parents were rare), well fed, and walked with friends a short distance to a school within their community. I placed parent helpers on a rotating schedule to accommodate all of their volunteering, and birthdays and holidays were celebrated with a buffet of home-baked treats brought in by the parents. My classroom had 18 students, and personal relationships were natural. When I sent homework home, it was always completed and returned on time.

Fast forward to 2015: divorce has skyrocketed, students are bussed across town, and often, their most substantial meals are served at school. Classrooms run anywhere from 36+ students to 90, and they straggle in late, often looking like they haven’t slept well. Both parents work to survive, making it nearly impossible for them to be involved in the classroom. In fact, I’m lucky if I see parents more than once a year at orientation or parent-teacher conferences. The opportunity to build relationships is at an all-time low. The world is a different place. People are stressed, busy, and distracted. The result? We’ve lost touch with the one thing that truly makes all the difference in education: human connection.

The Caring Quotient

Theodore Roosevelt once said: “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” Never before has this statement been truer. In a world that runs Mach II with our hair on fire, we all want to feel like we matter and that we’re connected. When I asked my now grown students, “How did you know your teacher cared about you?” these were the most common responses:

  • She let me know, or somehow otherwise made me feel important.
  • She was willing to be transparent. 
  • She corrected me without robbing my dignity. 
  • When I was having a tough time, she would notice and always ask me how I was doing. 
  • I could email her for advice, even when it wasn’t an assignment. 
  • I could tell that when I was speaking, she was really listening to me.

Working As A Team  

According to a recent study of more than 10,000 students, parents and teachers conducted by North Carolina State University, Brigham Young University, and the University of California, Irvine, “the role of family involvement is crucial when it comes to academic success.”

When students, parents, and teachers work together like a three-legged stool, academics increase dramatically. When one leg of the stool drops off, the stool ceases to function suitably. Most parents want to help, but find themselves at a loss as of what to do. Here’s where building relationships with parents will turn them into advocates. It becomes a partnership on the student’s behalf.

When positive relationships are built, studies show that:

  • Students earn higher grades and test scores improve dramatically
  • Increased number of students enroll in higher education 
  • There is less absenteeism 
  • Social skills improve 
  • Behavioral issues decrease
  • Graduation rates increase 
  • Violent crime rates among teens drop

When We Fail

The National Institute of Justice Journal indicates that parental disengagement in regards to their children’s academics is a major cause of youth violence:

“I doubt that there is an influence on the development of antisocial behavior among young people that is stronger than that of the family. A fifth pathway linking family problems with adolescent violence is through the impact of negative parenting on youngsters’ academic performance. There is now some very good research indicating that involvement in aggressive and antisocial behavior during adolescence is frequently preceded by school problems of one sort or another, including academic failure and conduct problems. Children who have problems in school often gravitate toward peer groups of other troubled children, and these peer groups frequently become involved in antisocial behavior. Engagement in school is a strong protective factor against antisocial behavior, and positive family relationships are predictive of school engagement.” 

Obstacles To Building Trust

When students and parents feel decisions are made without their inputor that their concerns aren’t heard, dissension toward administration can tear down interaction and involvement. Poor communication, frequent teacher turnover and weak ethical leadership all contribute to parents and students feeling vulnerable. Ultimately, these obstacles can end up creating an ‘us-against-them’ mentality, and academic success suffers.

Building Relationships Begins With Trust

When students and parents know they can trust teachers, they’re more likely to build a relationship that benefits everyone. Here are some clear points that, in my experience, almost always work towards achieving these ends. Though it is important to encourage this behaviour from students, it can’t always be expected. If the adults in the relationship, however — the teachers and parents — manage to practice these tenets consistently, the chances that the student will come on board, due to the developing trust in the relationship, increase greatly.

  • Begin first by demonstrating personal integrity– say what you mean and mean what you say. 
  • Finding ways for communication will build opportunities to share information. Perhaps that means being more accessible through texting, emails, and letters sent home. 
  • Being supportive of dissenting opinions will help facilitate engagement. 
  • Asking for others’ ideas and opinions. 
  • Ask for help but be specific. ‘Can you volunteer for our fundraiser?’ sounds like an overwhelming task, but asking if they could create the fundraiser sign-ups or call parent helpers relaxes the pressure a little. If they know the task, they may be more likely to say yes. Also, getting to know their unique talents and sending those projects their way will up your chances of engaging their help. 
  • Recognition on, and concern for, each other’s best interests and working to protect them
  • Being able to count on others to follow through
  • Believing the other party had the competence to perform the required tasks
  • Situations are being represented fairly 
  • Demonstrating authenticity and openness
  • Guarding confidentiality 

When the Hoy and Tschannedn-Moran Trust Scales were given in hundreds of schools, the results showed that when students, parents, and teachers built a higher level of trust, there was a strong degree of collaboration and cooperation.

Relationships at the elementary level: 

Accurately assessing your child in the early stages of learning is vital to setting a strong foundation for them. Often a learning challenge, caught early, can be corrected before it causes significant struggles. However, a teacher cannot always fully assess a child without parent input.  A parent may have significant information that can change the direction a teacher will develop for a student. Understanding trauma, for instance, can drastically affect a child’s ability to learn. Learning styles, if understood by the parent and the teacher, will greatly affect the ways information is shared with a student in the formative years, when it matters most.

For example, a young student that experienced several serious bouts of ear infections may not have learned to isolate sounds. This inability needs to be addressed to teach decoding phonetics in reading. A simple tool like using a mirror with both the child and the parent or teacher modeling the shape of the mouth with the sound can rebuild speech and hearing deficiencies. If a relationship isn’t established, this information might be lost, and a more severe diagnosis of the problem may be established.

Relationships at the secondary level: (6th-12th grade) 

Students in the pre-teen and teen years have already taken their personal inventory and find themselves lacking. It goes with the age. It may not be true, but it is their perception of themselves that will dictate their learning. Because teens tend to short-change their worth, they build masks that give them a false sense of protection. These masks show up in the form of belligerence, non-compliance, poor clothing choices, identifying with different groups of peers (the good and the bad), hair color, attitudes, addictions or shutting down. When a teacher can build a relationship with the parents, it gives them a wealth of insight into their students’ lives, and parents need to develop a relationship with their students’ teachers and administration for several reasons. Consider the following:

  • Teachers have an insight into your child’s life that you don’t. Remember they spend 25-40 hours a week with them and see your teen in peer situations as well as a variety of authoritative scenarios. As a parent, you need that input to sculpt them into adulthood.
  • Parents have a history that teachers need to better understand the student and help direct them toward college and careers.
  • Parents need teachers to help understand credits, college requirements, the value of internships and volunteering, and scholarships. In an ever-changing world of increasing information, teachers are your first line of defense. 

The Heart of the Matter

All humans, no matter our age, want to feel that we belong and that we matter. When we allow our relationships with those most important in our lives — this includes our childrens’ teachers —  to drop in the list of priorities, we open the window for developmental problems to begin taking hold with our children. I’m reminded of the students who contemplated ending their lives when another student, teacher or parent stepped in to engage with them. Those relationships saved their lives.

School shootings make our hearts ache, and we wonder if we could have done more to prevent them.  Perhaps a proper relationship with the perpetrator might have made the difference. By saving one, many others may be saved.

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Found at:  http://cultureofawareness.com/2015/11/07/what-matters-most-in-education-human-relationships/

Ernesto Ortiz – The Akashic Records – Sacred Wisdom for Transformation 2015

Archangel Gabriel via Marlene Swetlishoff – The Quality of Wisdom – 10-23-15

Angel of Light - gabriel - marleneArchangel Gabriel  via  Marlene Swetlishoff   –   The Quality of Wisdom   –   10-23-15

http://goldenageofgaia.com/2015/10/23/archangel-gabriel-via-marlene-swetlishoff-the-quality-of-wisdom/

Beloved Ones,

I want to have discourse on the quality of love known as wisdom.

In its essence, wisdom is the truth of the divine. It rises from within one’s inner guidance clearly, purely and simply as a knowing that something is absolutely true for them.

One’s inner guidance is always speaking to them and one exercises the quality of wisdom when they attune and listen to its quiet voice. In this way, they are guided to navigate the river of their live with divine intelligence.

Following one’s inner wisdom fills an individual with a sense of love for self and others. Wisdom is an undeniable knowing that a course of action is the wise choice to take and that one will be given all the guidance they need to do exactly the right thing.

When they trust their higher wisdom and inner guidance doing what feels good, they feel at peace within their heart knowing they are always led in the right direction. When they allow this inner wisdom to be heard, their life unfolds in mysterious and wonderful ways. It is a surrendering of personal wants and desires to the universal flow of life, the loving intelligence that is greater than anything one’s mind could conceive.

A mind that is united with inner wisdom becomes more proficient at fulfilling one’s deepest and most authentic desires. When one commits to discovering self with a sense of awe, curiosity and passion, they connect to a deep happiness that is unshakable by chaos, criticism, or current circumstance. Inner wisdom is the ability to access the language of the heart, the language of love and the language of feelings. It is a heartwarming sensory experience.

In order to hear one’s inner voice of higher wisdom, one needs to be mentally relaxed, physically and consciously aware and emotionally open to receive the guidance that comes forth. When one employs this inner wisdom to investigate their feelings, they become clear about what is currently happening in their life.

With this higher level of conscious awareness, they have the freedom to choose, knowing their feelings are providing important information about any given situation that is before them. When they allow their life to flow along with their inner wisdom, they feel happy in their heart. When they try to force things to go in a certain direction, it does not feel good to them, they lose their rhythm.

As they allow their life to unfold, each step they take gives them feedback with the answers that they need to set them back on track. They come to realize their body is their secret messenger that gives them clues which their inner wisdom is providing. It is important for each individual to become aware of how that occurs. They must be willing to act on it, to trust that it is taking them to the next step on their journey and is the right one for them.

As an individual is willing to meet everything that is arising in their experience by exploring it, their true direction in any given situation will become clear. Bringing compassion for self into this exploration is essential. As one surrenders to stepping into the unknown, they are allowing the flow of guidance of their higher wisdom. When they turn deep within and ask their inner guidance to help make the right choices, they are never led astray.

The more one listens, the easier it becomes to discern the correct answer when needed. One realizes that being an astute listener of their loving higher wisdom makes for a blessed life. When they follow their truth, they are allowing themselves to let their inner wisdom guide them rather than listening to their own personal desires. Their life is far more peaceful, centred, loving and gentle when they develop their inner listening skills. When they make a choice and do their best, every life situation offers the learning and growth that they need.

As each person aligns to and listens to their loving higher wisdom, their minds and hearts are filled with creative expression, new ideas and promptings that come from a place of fullness, a place of love and fulfillment. They know innately that they are aligned with a consciousness that speaks only truth and is characterized by feelings of trust and love, humbleness and gratitude, compassion and mercy, peace and harmony, and tolerance and forgiveness.

The more one identifies and aligns with their higher wisdom and consciousness, the greater their spiritual power becomes and things start to manifest in their lives through amazing synchronicities. The answers they receive make sense to them on more than one level because truth reveals itself on all levels. They come to realize that the power inside them is the same power that creates worlds and that part of their life purpose is to learn how to utilize this power to create the peaceful world they want. This has a wonderful positive effect on their life!

May your connection to your inner wisdom prompt you always to listen to your heart.  It is the creativeness of the universe speaking through you. It is a valuable guidance from deep within.

I AM Archangel Gabriel

Jesus via John Smallman – A lesson newly learnt brings a sense of peace and contentment – 8-29-15

jesus 3Jesus via John Smallman   –   A lesson newly learnt brings a sense of peace and contentment   –   8-29-15

Jesus Audio Blog for Saturday August 29th

https://johnsmallman2.wordpress.com/2015/08/29/a-lesson-newly-learnt-brings-a-sense-of-peace-and-contentment/

Hello, this is John with Jesus’ message for Saturday August 29th 2015. For a change I am including my whole channeling exchange with Jesus today (Friday August 28th) just so that you can see (or hear) how it happens. I do take breaks, as the energy gets quite intense at times, and then I return to my computer and we continue from where we broke off.

Jesus Blog # 263 for ​Saturday August 29th Channeled Friday August 28th 2015 10.50.

A lesson newly learnt brings a sense of peace and contentment.

Me:  Good morning Dear Jesus.  Thank you very much for your last message, it is nice to be communing with you once again after the long summer break that I took.  I seem to be more at peace, more content, more relaxed than I was earlier in the summer, so I hope I have released most of what was blocking our channel or leaving me unmotivated to be open to you or even positively not wanting to channel your loving and inspiring messages.  So, if you are available, can we please start a new one?

Jesus:   A very good morning to you, John.  Yes I am most definitely available to commune with you.  I am always available, so never hesitate to call on me as my task, my duty, my loving service is to be available to all who call on me.  Relax for just a moment, then we can start.

As I keep telling you, keep on hammering into you, all are One!  The state of separation from one another that appears to be the human condition is illusory, even though it seems so real to you all.  When God created You He gave You everything that He is – infinite unconditional Love and also therefore the absolute freedom, free will, that is one of its innumerable loving aspects – because Love just loves without conditions, eternally setting You free while at the same time maintaining You in a state of Oneness with Itself.

Within the illusion, as humans, that seems to be a very paradoxical and confusing idea because the illusion you constructed was intended to allow you to experience separation, and so the sense or state of Oneness had to be hidden, cloaked, or disguised.  In freedom you chose to establish an illusory state of limitation, of separation from God and therefore from Yourself!  Real separation is not possible because there is only One – God and You eternally engaged in an infinitely loving embrace that can never be broken.  It really is that simple.

All that you – humanity – have to do is open yourselves to your natural state, the state in which you were created and which you have never left, but which you have chosen to hide from yourselves under a cloak of darkness.  As an allegory you can think of the illusion as dark clouds that can obscure the sun.  But, the sun is always there, and although the clouds will dissipate, it seems that whether or not you can see the sun depends on fickle weather patterns flowing across the planet and over which you have no control.

However, the clouds hiding Reality from you are of your own making, and only you can dissolve them.  When you open to Love they dissolve.  Most of you have experienced moments of intense love when the radiance of the moment has shone briefly through the clouds of fear that mostly envelop you.  But you have considered those moments an aberration, a lucky meeting of minds or bodies when you inadvertently let your guard down and experienced a brief moment of ecstasy.  Often, before you have reset your guard, you have been hurt or betrayed by another proving to you that Love invariably leads to pain and suffering.  As you mature, or age, that safety barrier becomes ever more firmly established between you and the world outside to protect you from the inevitable attacks and betrayals that you know are just waiting to breach it.

And yet, you see others, maybe only a very few, who do not install those barriers to protect themselves from the dangers surrounding them.  They enjoy being vulnerable!  You dismiss their behavior as insane, especially if you see them apparently under attack or being betrayed.  But it still puzzles you because despite these attacks and betrayals they remain at peace.

Well the reason for that is that to be vulnerable makes you invulnerable!  To be offended is a choice you have to make.  Offensive behavior can only offend you if you choose to be offended.  And those loving souls who do not hide behind protective psychological barriers with their emotions safely locked away have not only realized this, but have also discovered that to be loving attracts others who are loving into their personal space, adding to their peace and contentment

To reiterate, from your perspective to be vulnerable appears to make it very likely that you will be taken advantage of and hurt, but in fact the opposite is the case.  Being vulnerable is being openly loving, being absolutely nonthreatening, and while it might appear that that is a very dangerous state to maintain, it in fact draws to you others who are willing and desirous of being loving.  To live in such a state dissolves fear and anxiety and allows you to behave in the most appropriate way in every moment because the Holy Spirit is guiding your every thought, word, and action.  It is a most relaxed and powerful way to go through life.  It will not obliterate pain and suffering but it will ensure that you are not overwhelmed when experiencing them.

Life in the illusion is painful, and suffering is unavoidable, but how you respond in each situation is a choice you are always free to make.  Often you react out of habit, instead of seeing each moment as independent of previous moments, and so you keep on repeating painful experiences, seeing them as imposed on you by a vicious world or a punishing god, and seeing yourselves as helpless victims in a very unsafe environment.

This is never the case.  Each one of you is following a life path that you planned prior to incarnating as a human with the loving guidance and assistance of your mentors in the spiritual realms – or, if you prefer, you may see it as guidance from God, the Holy Spirit, or the divine Mother.  The life path you are on is not random, everything that occurs during your life has a purpose, either for you directly, or for someone with whom you have a relationship – either long term or only momentary – nothing is accidental.

Your task on Earth is to learn each lesson that you placed upon your path as it arises.  If you do not, then it will arise again, possibly in a slightly different form, until eventually awareness dawns on you and you do learn it.  The lessons can be rather painful in order to catch your attention, but once learnt do not need repeating.  A lesson newly learnt brings a sense of peace and contentment, and leads to a greater willingness to accept life as it unfolds because you then realize that indeed everything does have a purpose which is far easier to see when you accept it instead of fighting against it.

In the spiritual realms you have guides and mentors watching over you constantly, ready and waiting for you to ask them for assistance which they will then most graciously and willingly provide, but only when you ask.  To assist before you asked would be an invasion of your personal energy field, an overriding of your free will, and none in the spiritual realms, not even God Himself, would do that.  But as soon as you ask we are there for you, because we love you and we do not want to see you suffering.

So, today’s message is basically a reiteration of the fact that there is only Love, all else is illusory, and that we in the spiritual realms are watching over you constantly and ready to assist you instantly when you call on us.  Therefore Please call on us for assistance with even the smallest or seemingly most insignificant of issues because it is our joy and our duty to serve you in any way that we can.

Your loving brother, Jesus.